It’s not rocket science people…

So the bike racks in the parking lot at my office are of the “lowboy” variety – that is, the bike’s front wheel sits inside a pair of low profile metal loops that make up the rack. The racks are arranged in a single row with access available from either side.

Lowboy bike rack

Now, it is obvious to me and to any right thinking person that the only appropriate way to park one’s bike in this particular arrangement is to alternate loops on each side. In other words, if Bike A parks in slot 1, entering on the west side of the rack, then Bike B parks in slot 2, entering on the east side, Bike C parks in slot 3, etc.  This provides easy ingress and egress for all bicycles; minimizes pedals, handlebars, baskets and other equipment from getting all smashed up and tangled; and leaves some room to attach the lock to the bike and rack.

Like this, dummies

Instead, of course, people just park all willy-nilly, with nary a care nor a thought for their fellow cyclists. When I arrived this morning, slot 1 and slot 4 were both being used by east-facing bikes! Whether I properly park in slot 2 or 3, the remaining slot will now either be out of commission or some jackass will just cram his shitty bike in there, making it a big production for me to simply retrieve my bike. IDIOTS. It’s really the moral equivalent of taking up two parking spaces.

And, as if that weren’t bad enough, someone (who shows up to work earlier than I – presumably solely out of spite) has AGAIN parked his bike in slot 1 – which as everyone should be well-aware is MY spot that I have been using for ages. Why must my life be such a trial? The sole consolation is that my bike is still far-and-away the best bike on the rack….

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